Contentment- My Personal Happiness

Thinking you're gonna die is really clarifying.

You know, the same old story.

You find a mushroom you think do I wanna get high? Over 180 species of mushrooms get you high. You then think, yes. Anything but the mundane world we're trapped in. So you eat the mushroom. You check on-line to see if it's poisonous. You check. You're not sure. You read how that if it is poisonous you will have to wait two days then you'll start vomiting. On the sixth day you'll die, you're liver will be destroyed and you will die.

Exciting, right?

Anyway I at ethe mushroom. We ate them. We don't get high. That's very bad. Wow only two options left. Either there edible, normal mushrooms growing wild or... well... there, not.

And I was thinking last night what if? What if I died in six days time. The funny thing was I wasn't scared, I wasn't even sad for the people I would leave behind. Mental clarity hit me. The things I want to say to people. The people who I don't want in my life anymore. The people I want in my life. The people I would miss. The things I'd wished I'd said and done.

Then I realised I would probably regret a lot of things.

Regret them. But not change them if I'd changed what I've done. I'd change myself. If I behaved like anyone but myself, who was I?

I was happy, in that moment with everything I had done and had. I would give anything to feel like that all the time. It's what we all want isn't it?